P*SSY A** B*TCH
Chrissy Teigen said it, and it was reiterated before Congress. Is it accurate?... Heck yeah, it is! I just wish some renegade had switched out the stage lighting behind Trumpy during his speech. No go, so this tee will have to do.
Works best with dark shirts.
STRONGMAN DIAPERS
"Lock Up" Moisture® with Strongman Diapers. Trusted by both despots and the delusional worldwide, Strongman Diapers employ Machismofiber® technology to keep a 100% man 100% dry 100% of the time. Strongman... diapers for the DICTATOR in YOU.
TRUMPY ON THE RUN
A rework of the Trumpy On The Run cover, everyone (it seems) is out the "get" Trumpy. Nevermind he'd brought this all on by his lonesome, with his big mouth, bigger hubris, and gargantuan stupidity. Ultimately, it's ALL someone else's fault.
THE F TEAM
In 2024, a commando unit on crack was sent to prison for a crime they totally committed. These "men" promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Deep South underground. Today, still wanted by the government they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you're stupid enough to look for them....maybe you can hire The F-Team
COVFEFE!!!
A rework of the OG book, Trumpy Unleashed. Pissed that things aren't going precisely how his warped peabrain had envisioned, and hours since the consumption of his last diet beverage, Trumpy is in no mood for reality.
GAETZIE THE CLOWN
Florida's Finest! Glowing reviews! He's the "Sweet 16 Specialist". Can't say much more or I'll get in a lotta trouble... really really! (fans of 80's alt rock will get the reset).
FRUIT STRIPPED ("Remove the Orange" edition)
The infamous chewing gum of yesteryear that held its flavor for EXACTLY 30 seconds before devolving into a clump of rubber inside your mouth. And that amount of time is a generous approximation as to how long I can listen to MAGAs scream "rigged" and "unfair" despite ZERO evidence supporting such claims.
